Hi,

I empathize with you.. This happens all too often in India, where women have to give up on their dreams..

Lets just see the facts:
- you couldnt take up your dream job because of your parents
- you left 3 great dream jobs because of your inlaws
- to fulfill your husband's dream, you put your dream on hold.

You have already lost a lot of wonderful opportunities in the past. If you didn't have a baby on the way, I would say that it is high time you do something for yourself and let your family do the compromising for once.

But.. In all this, nothing is your unborn baby's fault. Your unborn baby does not deserve to be foisted off to some Day Care while you finally get to live your dream. Dreams have a way of changing or adapting as per your situation. But you, on the other hand, have seemed to hold onto your dream for a long long time. See, times are changing.. It is possible for mothers to do both - excel at work AND be a good mother. But looking at the fact that you wish to leave your baby for ten hours at a stretch means that you will only be able to excel at work. Being an IT developer can still be a dream you pursue. But you need to look for a flexible or part-time or work from home job so you can do both. Some companies have started hiring women to work a few days in office and the rest of the days from home. why dont you try finding a job like that. try fleximoms.in. it has good opportunities for moms.

If you cannot find flexible work timings in your chosen field of work, it maybe time that adapt your dream a little. There are many other profiles in IT, some of which will definitely have flexible timing options. You need to look into those..

Without grandparents also to support your child, your child will need you around. But that doesn't mean you need to give up on your dreams. Just adjust your dreams a little, and you can have it all. A well-balanced compromise within your family is key to it all.